Why do we only suffer from our I / ego BEYOND our true SELF?

In order to escape the "supposedly" (!) unavoidable suffering in our lives, we must increasingly shift our inner supporting leg (the perceived centre of gravity of our inner emotional anchoring) from our separative dual thinking in the head to our true SELF. How does this work?

"Why do we only suffer from our I / ego BEYOND our true SELF?“ by Portrait Photography BEYOND-Duality.com, Guillena (Sevilla) 2023

"I often feel a real love-hate relationship with my father", a coachee recently told me and asked me for strategic inspiration on how to deal with this often difficult and contradictory feeling:

Love-hate includes both the dual-dividing hate that arises from our EGO and the non-dual-connecting feeling of love that arises from the core of our SELF. Our self is always connected to everything "supposedly" external beyond duality and time (👉 YouTube "What is Nonduality" by Deepak Chopra). In this respect, love-hate is always better than pure dual-dividing hate, because the contradictory feeling of love-hate at least indicates that we have already temporarily found an inner access to our TRUE SELF. The crucial question now is where our "supporting leg" and our "free leg" are primarily anchored - in love or in hate? - and how can we optimise the balance between our supporting leg and our free leg?

In order to escape the "supposedly" (!) unavoidable suffering in our lives, we must increasingly shift our inner supporting leg (the perceived centre of gravity of our inner emotional anchoring) from our separative dual thinking in the head to our Self, i.e. to the Solar Plexus. How does this work?

"My Self" recommends the method "The Secret of the Golden Flower" 👉Link, which has been tried and tested for 1200 years. This wonderful process, which requires a daily practice of 3-12 months (depending on individual disposition and time commitment), is only linear up to a certain point of development. From this point, however, at some point, at the right time, an "inner leap towards our inner true SELF" is required (👉 “Zen in the Art of Archery“ by Eugen Herrigel):

In the course of this wonderful inner process
"The Secret of the Golden Flower"…

we turn our senses from the outside inwards,
our breathing becomes increasingly calmer,
our heart "comes back" and fixes itself (i.e. heart, breathing & senses no longer go outwards),
our inner light energy circulates with our breath backwards (!) via our Spinal Cord, additional cosmic primal energy ("Prana") flows into us from the point between our eyes (where the Indians draw the Bindi) and increasingly charges us energetically - like a Duracell battery (👉 "Metahuman" & "Quantum Body" by Deepak Chopra, #17 influential thinker in the world and #1 in Medicine Fitness”. TIME magazine has described Dr. Chopra as "one of the top 100 heroes and icons of the century"),
our often unpleasantly disturbing thoughts in our head finally dissolve completely (stress, problems & worries dry up), suddenly the right thoughts flow into us from our Self in the solar plexus,
we experience an ever deeper feeling of boundless love, deepest joy of life and wonderful connectedness (expression of the natural anchoring of our inner supporting leg in the Self),
we interact with all external things only through our "I-play-leg". This inner development step in the 1200 year old method is called "The living manner of circulating our inner light",

‼️This step is the focus of my executive coaching for leaders: you can reach an inner state where all daily business interactions feel like "playing chess" WITHOUT our inner anchorage (our foothold in the self) being negatively affected in any way by these interactions - your previously often negative "attachment" disappears completely

our self views our ego as if from a high mountain (👉 "The Book of Five Rings" by Miyamoto Musashi),
our life circumstances (the circumstances of our ego!) lose their negative power over our life,
the shadow of supposedly inevitable suffering is displaced by our increasing inner light, our precious life in the here and now suddenly becomes very light and completely wonderful (👉 "The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying" by Sogyal Rinpoch…

...and how should I deal with opportunistic attacks from other people in the future?

This inner turmoil in the feelings of love-hate relationship is of course exacerbated by real personal attacks - even criminal offences in my own family - that coachees sometimes bring to me.

Is it even possible to deal with family members in this way? Is such behaviour at all compatible with the feelings of deep connection and love that one feels in good times?
The simple answer is: "Yes!"

To understand this answer, it is advisable to read one of India's wisest books, the "Bhagavad Gita": This book makes it clear that the level of the SELF is completely separate from the level of the I/Ego. The Self cannot be experienced in our “supposed“ external reality (consisting of three-dimensional space and time) that we perceive with our five senses. Our I/ego, on the other hand, is exclusively trapped in this limited space of our external reality. Our ego is mainly caught up in the material and sensual temptations of the past and the future. The EGO collapses exactly where the only connection to OUR TRUE SELF is: In the "HERE & NOW" (👉"Shinjinmei", Shin jin mei = Poem on Faith In Mind: This is the oldest Ch’an text and is the work of the third patriarch, Sosan (died in 606). In the Shin jin mei, Sosan studies the profound nature of the mind and transmits the marrow of Bodhidharma and Eka’s teaching, the essence of Zen:

Neither choosing, nor rejecting; no duality, no discrimination; realize the oneness of the Way.

Since the fictitious EGO and the true SELF have no overlap, it is perfectly possible to feel unconditional love for a person (love that is not unconditional is basically not love❣️) at the level of the SELF and at the same time defend your territory with all means - like a “Samurai“👉Samurai Code - against I-centred opportunists at the level of the EGO⚔️. This is precisely why I included a Zen Master & Samurai in my sales management training courses on Key Account Management, which I held for 7 years at the Swiss ZfU International Business School:

When a lot of money is at stake or an opportunistic change of position promises great advantages, only then do you realise the full extent of the EGO in other people - often with speechless horror…

My KAM & Samurai Management Training at Swiss ZfU

Flyer ZfU KAM.pdf

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To understand the dual-separating, opportunistic EGO and its latent dangers for humane human relationships, I recommend the book "The Seventh Cross" by Anna Seghers (nominated for the 1967 Nobel Prize for Literature by the German Academy of the Arts): In it, she describes her own bitter "moral experiences“ with opportunistically acting fellow human beings, which she had to make as a Jewish refugee between 1932 and 1940 in Germany and France.

Addendum to the above:

Statista estimates that there were around 200,000 Nazi perpetrators in Germany and Austria - of which only 6,500 were convicted 👉Link.
Even at the end of 1944, almost 8.8 million people over the age of 17 still belonged to the NSDAP. That was around one in eight German citizens at the time 👉Link.
Only very few Germans - it is estimated that there were several thousand - actively participated in the resistance against the Nazi regime 👉Link.

On the basis of these figures, anyone can estimate for themselves what percentage of the German population behaved "opportunistically" in such a critical situation at the time and would therefore certainly not have helped a Jew persecuted in Germany like Anna Seghers: 20%, 30%?, or perhaps even more?

I find it historically fascinating that all these opportunists were then cumulatively "exonerated" by simply blaming this cumulative guilt on the 24 (!) “main war criminals" who were indicted in the Nuremberg "show trials" (👉Link) through an opportunistic marketing campaign. Why was this indictment not at least extended to the 200,000 known Nazi perpetrators?

This is sad, but easy to understand: The Marshall Plan strategically envisaged a reinvigorated Germany, and all these opportunists were needed for the reconstruction...

...but without batting an eyelid they allowed the children and grandchildren of these many EGO-centred Nazi opportunists to suffer under the inhumane Nazi educational ideals even after 1945 - in some cases even to this day?

What did such a "hard" - i.e. driving out the naturally "unruly" SELF in children as far as possible - German education look like in the first 60 years of the 20th century? I recommend the film "The White Ribbon" (in 2009 the film received the highest jury prize in Cannes, the Palme d'Or) by Michael Haneke.

Thank God the youth was strong enough, at least from the 1968s onwards, to oppose this appropriately: "Characteristic of the 1968 movement was the rejection of traditionalism and German political authority by the protesting students, many of whom were former Nazi functionaries"...

🗣️Spoken orally from my SELF in the Here&Now and then kindly optimised and converted into written words by the AI tool Deepl🙏 on 13 September 2024 in Bolonia, Spain☀️

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